Tuesday, March 11, 2008

Luchadores Know Very little about Microwaves or Bags of M&M's

So you know how in Pinocchio Jimmeny Cricket is there to be a guide ( i mean he's the conscience right?) Well I don't have a friendly whistling cricket. No, I have luchadores. One wears blue and looks a lot like Nacho. The other wears red with a gold face mask ( strikes a strange resemblance with Ramses ). Well if I have learned one thing from them is that they don't know very much about proper cooking times in a microwave (why would they? they eat raw eagle eggs to summon special powers - if you don't understand the reference you can just go away and read some books). But it's true. They lack very little knowledge on the subject. Let me give you a forinstance: I pull my Michelinas entree from the freezer at work. And i look at the instructions microwave on high for 4 minutes. Ok... that's probably good. ***POOF*** here's the blue luchadore (these are not like your average good vs evil shoulder angels. These are just two dudes who both come up with bad ideas a lot. ) So here is the dialogue that goes down.

Blue: Hey are you really going to cook it for 4 minues? Yesterday when you cooked the same thing that was way too much time.
ME: yeah.... but now it's been in the freezer longer. You know how the lunchroom freezer doubles as a cryogenics lab....
Blue: Point taken. Zap fry it man!!!
***POOF*** (Now we've got the red one too)
Red: Maybe you could do it for a couple minutes then stir it and do a couple more. I know that's worked before
Me: True....
Blue: Zap it
Red: No at least just do the time it says.
Me: Ok i'll make you two a deal I'll do it for 4 minutes and 30 seconds. Fair enough?
Blue: Sissy
Red: Wreckless Hooligan

So i pop it in vent the lid and let it go. Needless to say it comes out like shoe leather. So now that my ravioli is nasty I resort to my bag of M&M's. Once again we have our luchadores.

RED: Just rip it open man!!!
Blue: Maybe you should go get the scissors or use that plastic knife there
RED: Scissors are for sissies. Just rip!

RIP

plink plank plunk tick a tack tok click

I'm not eating them off the floor......
Well I have my water bottle back at my desk. Thanks Little Luchadores.

1 comment:

John said...

You make me laugh sooo hard....I wish I had luchadores to help me make the hard decisions in life about microwaves and m&ms. You were alost looking like a fatty there for a second...good thing those luchadores where there!